Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
