I can text with my tongue
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
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