I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
