I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
