so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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