Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
