Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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