So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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