I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??