You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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