Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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