And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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