Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize
