sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize