last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Randomize
