Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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