he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
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