If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
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