Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
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