just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
high people should be assigned attendants
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize
