So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Randomize