There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
