You're completely useless in the revolution.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
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I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
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i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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