Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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