Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
