Yo dont text me then not text me
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
