you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
