Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
