Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Apparently at some point last night someone gave me tequila. There was a few shots left when I woke up so that was breakfast. This is a good birthday
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
