On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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