the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
We don't watch enough power rangers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize