Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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