What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
