I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Randomize
