i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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