one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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