sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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