i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
