Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
