'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
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