A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize