I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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