I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
