What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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