you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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