No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
She bit a glass in half.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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