Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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