It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
