I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
