Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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