dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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